(Good) Grief!

It's an absolutely beautiful cold and rainy Sunday afternoon, the kind I like best. I love winter in Abilene. Wow. It just hit me that I'm not going to be around to experience this one. That's been happening alot lately. I think about how much I love something, and realize that I'm never going to get to do it again. I've already experienced many Abilene "lasts," but now I'm coming up on the last of the "lasts." It's really tough. Next Sunday will be the last time I get to see the Thanksgiving bags fill up the front of the auditorium. The Sunday after that will be the last time I get to sing on the worship team. "The Good News Christmas Cruise" will be my last children's christmas musical. December 12th will be my last day at Highland as a member. Highland has been so good to me over the past four and a half years. There's no church I'd rather be a part of. As much as I will miss ACU, I will miss Highland more than anything when I leave. I don't even like to think about it, so I'm not going to anymore. I'm convinced that denial is the best possible place to be at this point in time.

Today's service was great. I love worship team Sundays. It's so amazing to get to look out on the body of believers and see their faces as they worship. It's not so much the faces you even see, really, but the hearts. Today was an especially revealing Sunday. Mike spoke about the importance of grieving in the body. This summer, Shelley and I often discussed how the church is a place for lament just as much as anything else. Mike understands grief. I've never really had to grieve much. The only grieving I've done lately is about leaving Abilene. However, I do know that it's really encouraging for people who have had to grieve to have a minister who knows where they're coming from and believes that grief is important within a body of believers. In fact, he said that it's only through our grief that we really know each other. I agree. After the message, a group of us sang "You Raise Me Up," a song recently recorded by Josh Groban and then "Blessed be the Name of the Lord" by Matt Redman. Seeing the tears mixed with smiles today was such a blessing! At the end of the second service, as we begin singing "Blessed Be," two year-old Anna Claire squirmed out of her dad's arms and ran across the front of the church and jumped into Mike's arms, as if to say "It's okay!" So precious. After watching that whole little scene play out, it was hard not to be emotional up onstage. I feel so fortunate that I was one of the ones who got to see it happen. Like my friend Ryan says, as worship leaders, we have the best seat in the house. Praise God for that!